


To Build A Home

by Sarielle



Series: Monster Family [1]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Adopted Sibling Relationship, Adoption, American Sign Language, Autistic Frisk, Domestic, Drabbles, F/F, F/M, Family Issues, Gen, Mental Health Issues, Mentions of Frisk's birth family, Mute Frisk, Nonbinary Character, Nonbinary Frisk, Parent-Child Relationship, Post-Pacifist Route, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, life on the surface
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-14
Updated: 2015-12-27
Packaged: 2018-05-06 15:38:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,923
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5422553
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sarielle/pseuds/Sarielle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A series of short moments of post-pacisfist Frisk and their new monster family adjusting to life on the surface.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Frisk ans Sans: Marshmellows

**Author's Note:**

> I seem to function a lot better with drabble based stories and I have a few post-pacifist ideas rolling around which eventually culminated in me posting this. If you've read 'Flashbulb' this exists in the same world though 'Flashbulb' is set a bit later than this chapter. My Monster Family consists of Papyrus, Toriel, Sans, Frisk and Asriel/Flowey. Undyne and Alphys have their own house not far away as does Asgore.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sans and Frisk stop for snacks on the way to Undyne's

The graffiti in the tunnel walls seem to blend together as the train tracked past, creating the illusion of blurred ancient glyphs lining the darkened subway. Frisk watched the changing walls transfixed, occasionally faced with glimpses of their own reflection when the train passed through total darkness.

“What are you thinking about kiddo?” Sans piped up from their side. Humans on the train stole glances at them from time to time, Frisk was long over the novelty of being a novelty.

 _[Nothing]_ they kept watching the walls. They chanced a look at Sans, gauging his expression.

The skeleton smiled. “What nothing at all? What’s up in your noggin then? Just Empty Space?” He lightly tapped a knuckle against the child’s temple. They giggled. A young red-headed woman gave Sans an alarmed look. Frisk giggled again, louder and purposely happier. Daring her to start something. The woman looked away.

 _[I like the train]_ they signed, and despite all the nosy people it wasn’t a lie.

Sans looked quizzical. “Yeah? Not too busy for you then, not too many people?”

Frisk shook their head.

 _[I’m fine.]_ They leaned against Sans’ bony shoulder, head touching the hood of his jacket. Frisk hands moved quietly, fidgeting to sooth themselves. They fiddled aimlessly with the gold buttons on the big blue winter coat Toriel had made them wear when they left the house, along with the stripped knitted hat and scarf she’d made herself.

 _[It’s Peaceful]_ they signed. Sans arm tightened around their back.

Years ago they remember being too little to get on the train unaided, a harried woman with long dark hair and sad eyes carried them across the gap and held their hand when they stood beside her on the crowded train. People surrounded them, other passengers on the train were several whole feet taller than Frisk themself and they dwarfed the child

“She’s lovely, how old is she?” A kindly old woman had asked. She had skin like the crumpled crepe tissue paper they let the kids draw on at preschool.

“You’re four now, aren’t you honey?” Frisk looked away, all eyes on them, there weren’t any words they could give this woman, and their Mom didn’t like them using sign with strangers.

Nobody thought to let Frisk find their own way of communication. No it was words or nothing. No speech, no brain, no worth.

“She’s just shy.” Her mother had lied and her grip on Frisk’s wrist tightened marginally. They felt the shame waft off their mother in waves.  Frisk had no spoken words to express how all these people set off loud crackling TV static in their head, and right now their skin felt thin and soluble like rice paper, so even their mother’s feathery touch hurt them. 

We’re at our stop, bud.” Sans tugged briefly the sleeve of their coat. They were back in the present, back with their real family.

_[Okay.]_

Sans offered a bony hand. “Give me your hand, yeah? Don’t want you getting lost in the crowd.”

 _[Busy]_ they signed, standing on the escalator next to Sans holding on to his sleeve. As they rose out of the subway station the busy city street they were everything was whirring and fast.

 _[Crowded]_ They added, hands already twitching to move to feel out their space in the crowd.

“Yeah it's real crowded today. Are you doing okay? You'll tell me if it's too much for you, right kiddo? It’s not too far to Undyne’s from here and I packed your blanket so you can just chill out under it if it gets a bit much for you. It should be less busy at Al and Undyne’s place."

_[It’s okay. I wanna watch anime]_

“What's that, kid? Oh you mean at Undyne’s? Yeah, Al said she’d got a series we’d both like that she’s gonna marathon.

Frisk nodded bouncing with excitement _[Can we watch it? Does it have cool swords?]_

“Yeah we can do that, bud.” we’re almost there. I just wanna stop to get some snacks first."

_[Snacks. Ice cream?]_

“Kiddo it’s the middle of winter.” The skeleton chuckled shaking his skull. 

 _[Ice cream]_ They clapped their hands together with glee.

“Sorry, Frisk but your Mom would kick my butt if you get a cold.”

_[Ice cream doesn’t give you colds]_

“Still I’ m not gonna risk it”

Frisk blew him a raspberry.

Some people stared as they entered the store, no doubt they were an interesting sight to other humans: the small bouncing child lovingly swaddled in their winter coat, hat and scarf talking with their hands, alongside a short stout skeleton in a worn out blue hoodie.

“Is that your kid?” asked the cashier when they got to the checkout, he gave Sans a befuddled look.

Sans let the question roll off him, Frisk sensed his fingers twitching in annoyance.

“Yup.” He said putting another bag of popcorn on the counter next to the soda.

Frisk tugged at his sleeve, he glanced over. [ _I want to make hot cocoa when we get to Alphys’]_

“You’ll have to ask your aunts.”

_[Okay. Can we get marshmallows?]_

“What’s that you’re doing with your hands, honey?” asked the cashier.

Frisk looked at Sans expectantly. He sighed. “Talking. It’s Sign Language.”

“Is she deaf?” the man asked.

Frisk shook their head.

Sans reached out and held his hand just above Frisk’s shoulder as if he was going to give them a reassuring pat but his hand hovered not actually touching them until they nodded their head and he gave their shoulder a squeeze.  They appreciated the gesture, and that Sans always stopped to ask before showing affection.

“No, they just don’t talk. And they’re not a girl.” His tone was hard and cold.

Frisk used to this line of questioning by now and over it tugged on Sans sleeve.

He glanced down at them. “Yeah?”

 _[Marshmallows]_ exaggerating the sign and speeding up to convey urgency. 

Sans nodded. “Yeah, alright, kid. If you’re quick and come straight back, you can have marshmallows.”

Frisk squeaked triumphant and turned to run away before Sans changed his mind, still they weren’t out of earshot quick enough not to hear the shop assistant’s next remark.

“So does she have a real dad or?”

“Yes, he just works Saturdays Not that it’s any of your business pal.”

Frisk thought about this, as they trawled down the confectionary aisle running their fingers along the packets of candies. They had Asgore, who they called Dad, and no doubt that was who Sans was referring to, hard at work on the other side of town in the little flower shop he ran with his human wife, Ivy. But that was not who the cashier meant by real dad, and the answer was more nebulous than Frisk wanted to wrack their ten-year-old head about.

There was a human man from their early memory, he wasn’t around a lot and when he was he looked at Frisk like they were a burden, a great liability five-years old in a pair of juice-stained overalls, a voiceless shadow of a child bearing him no joy and reaping no benefits, he used to take great pain in assuring them that he wasn’t their real father. Frisk knew nothing of their ‘real’ father except their mother never mentioned him. He could have been a monster for all they knew.

They grabbed a jumbo bag of marshmallows and headed back to the checkout Sans was idly checking his phone, outwardly unperturbed by the human’s previous line of questioning.

“Hey kid, good to go?” Frisk nodded and held out the packet for him to take.

“Anything else today, Sir?”  asked the cashier, he seemed a lot less cocky than before and he was sweating noticeably.

“That'll be all thanks.” Sans paid, took the bags in one hand and nodded to the cashier.

“You have a good time.”

 _[Sans?]_ Frisk signed, their hands waving to get his attention.

“Mhmm?” He shot them a glance as they exited the store. Frisk was fidgeting anxiously with their coat buttons again.

 _[Are you ok?]_ Their little face looked sad, dark eyes big and liquid.

“Fine as ever, kiddo.  Let's get a move on to your aunts’ though. We both need to be around less people.”

Hand-in-hand the woolen bundle of a child and short, stout little skeleton headed down the busy street towards Undyne and Alphys' apartment. 


	2. Frisk, Alphys and Undyne: Date Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The best part about their parents' Date Night is they get to spend it with their aunts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was feeling sad so I wrote some cute. I don't know if I've mentioned but in this universe Frisk went back for Flowey and he lives with Sans, Toriel Frisk and Papyrus. He's not always easy to live with but Frisk is a determined kid and Toriel would do anything to get to see her son again, even if it's not always for long. Featuring Alphy and Undyne who I genuinely think would be the coolest of trash aunts to Frisk and Asriel. Also if anyone shouldn't see a Fullmetal Alchemist rip-off anime it's a little boy possessing a soulless flower. I don't think Frisk has thought that one through.

Date Night was Frisk’s second favourite family tradition after Pasta Fridays. It combined two things they loved: their parents’ happiness and hanging out with their cool aunts.

Every other Thursday Sans and Tori would have an evening out all to themselves, while Undyne and Alphys were on Frisk-sitting duty. Sometimes Papyrus would come along if he wasn’t working or at cooking classes, but the larger skeleton was doing so well with his budding career as a chef he was often quite busy in the evenings.

Frisk loved their aunts place, it was like a living art exhibit. A tribute to chaos. The living room was divided into functional parts, watching, working, eating. In one corner was Alphys’ goliath of a computer, she’d built it herself, with bits and pieces she’d got from her job working at an electronics store. Alphys was very proud of her computer, she had lots of videos on building your own machine on the YouTube channel she shared with Undyne but Frisk didn’t watch those ones the jargon was a bit too technical for them to understand. They prefer their unboxing and anime reaction videos.

Alphys answered the door in yellow polka-dotted boxers and a video game t-shirt that looked like it had seen better days. She scratched her nose. Sans in his dress shirt, slacks, and novelty bow-tie looked slightly jealous. 

“Hey Frisk. O-oh and you too of course your majesty, Uh and Sans.”

“You don’t need to call me your majesty anymore, Alphys. Toriel is fine. I stopped being queen long ago.”

“You’re still the queen of my heart.” Quipped Sans with the cheesiest grin he could manage. He made finger guns. Tori burst into giggles.  Frisk hummed with amusement.

“Oh don’t you start.” She said a slight blush rising to her fuzzy cheeks. She covered her giggles with a soft white hand.

“We shouldn’t be back much later than 11” Said Sans to Alphys. The lizard woman nodded, smiling at the small child in front of them. “I-I’m sure we’ll be fine until then, won’t we?”

Frisk nodded enthusiastically their bangs bobbing in and out of their eyes. They loved Alphys and they loved Undyne, and hanging out at their place meant pizza, junk food and anime; the god tier of cultural delights for a ten-year-old.

“They’ve got their bear and blanket in their backpack, if they need to just have some quiet time let them. You’ll tell Alphys if you need anything right, little one?”

Frisk nodded again. _[Bye, mom.]_ They signed. _[Love you]_

Toriel bent down to face them. She pressed a kiss to the top of their head. “You’ll be good now for your aunts, won't you my child?”

Frisk made a double thumbs up. _[Have fun, Mom, Sans.]_

“Oh we will!” said Sans with a grin. He ruffled the child’s hair. “Don’t get into too much trouble without me, now?”

Frisk shook their head. _[No promises]_

“How’re you doing Frisk?” asked Alphys, closing the door when the others had left.

Frisk let out a soft contented humming noise.

[Fine. Where’s Undyne?] they signed.

“She’s just got out of the shower. She worked late at the mall last night so she’s only just woken up.”

Frisk nodded without a sign.

Undyne had handled the transition from ‘Undyne: Captain of the Royal Guard’ to ‘Undyne: Defender of the Shopping Mall’ relatively well. It helped she didn’t see it as a demotion more of a change of location.

 Frisk did wonder if they deserved better but bringing the Royal Scientist and Captain of the Royal Guard into the human world’s terms was no small task, Monsters couldn’t yet join the military in any occupation, and Alphys had no qualifications in human science. She was taking correspondence classes in biology and chemistry so she could do some further study but for now they had to make do as they were.

If either woman had any qualms with how the humans treated them or how they segued into the new society neither talked about it in front of their nibling. As far as Frisk could tell her aunts were just happy to be with each other

“Hey! It’s my favourite little human!” Undyne wandered into the living room in shorts and a sports bra, a towel slung over her shoulder her wet red hair flowing down her back like a river of blood. She picked at a pile of laundry balanced precariously on one arm of the sofa and pulled a crumpled singlet over her head.

Frisk waved at her, they took their backpack off and put it on the ground.

[What are we gonna watch tonight?] Frisk didn’t mess around. They came for the anime and they were ready to rumble.

“Ooh!” Alphys whirled around her tail swishing behind her like a whip. “we’ve been watching this new series! It’s _soo_ good! It’s called ‘Alchemy Sisters’ and it’s about these two sisters and their parents are renowned scientists but their father dies in a tragic accident and they turn to magic to try and bring him back and- Mmf-Mruh!!” Undyne had crossed the room and snuck up on her girlfriend, she hugged her from behind, her chin on the smaller woman’s shoulder, her hand over her mouth.

“Alphys! Don’t spoil the whole show before they get to watch it!” she scolded, releasing her with a smooch on the cheek.

“O-Oh. Sorry, Frisk. I was getting carried away. Would you like to watch some?”

Frisk nodded excitedly flapping their hands about.  _[Yes please!  I love anime!]_

“A child after my own heart.” Grinned Alphys flopping onto the sofa with her phone in hand. Knocking the precarious laundry pile onto the floor in an avalanche of clothes.

“Sorry, I’m just replying to some of our tweets, don’t mind me.” She said.

Frisk sat down next to her, Undyne took the other side. _[Youtube right, how’s that going?]_ the child signed.

“Oh it’s alright.” Alphys started, picking her words out carefully. She looked up briefly from her phone and pushed her glasses up her nose. “People seem to find my computer videos helpful and that's what matters the most to me.”

“Whaddya mean!?” Undyne clenched her fists determinedly, her eyes shining. “The last Mewmew power pack unboxing video we did got over a hundred thousand views!” she enthused. “We’re an awesome team, babe!”

Alphys smiled, small and appreciative. “Y-yeah but that's all down to you, Dy. Nobody else opens their boxes with a spear! People love you!”

Undyne shook her head rapidly, spraying some water from her still wet hair and fins. “Hah! Not just me! Everyone loves your passion!  you love everything you talk about so much! I wish I could love things half as much as you do! You're so cool! isn't she, Frisk? My super cool girlfriend?!”

Frisk giggled, nodding. [Very cool] they signed with a big grin.

Alphys turned pink in the face. “A-Anyway! Should we put something on? She gestured at the television.

“Food first!” said Undyne sitting bolt upright. “Who wants what on their pizza? I'll order!”

 _[I bought snacks]_ said Frisk, pausing to pull a container out of their backpack. _[Mom and I made brownies! Az helped]_

The lizard woman made a face of concern and Frisk waved their hands to reassure her,  

 _[Our Mom supervised. They're not poisoned.]_  Alphys relaxed. She moved to clear some of the debris: empty plates, bottles and the like from the coffee table, so she could place the box of brownies there.

“Where's your brother tonight anyway?”  asked Undyne. “He's missing out on the best kind of night: The Anime kind.”

[Home. He wasn't feeling very good. Mom said to give him some space]

“Oh.” Said Alphys softly. “Well, that’s understandable, we all have our bad days.”

Undyne scooted over to kiss her nose. “Don't you get sad now.”

Alphys shook her head, giggling again, her reddening face turning her scales an alarming shade of orange.

“Dy! not in front of the human.”

Frisk shook their head. _[I don't mind, you guys.]_

“Right!”  Said Undyne jumping up to her feet “Pizza time”

[I want pepperoni] Frisk said, already picking at a brownie.

“Ooh! Ooh! Do you want to get that spicy vegetarian one we tried last week? “ Alphys piped up with starry eyes that was soo good

“Sure thing, Babe! I’ll go order now.” Undyne disappeared off into the kitchen to find the house phone.

Frisk was staring off into space, pensive. _[Do you get pizza every week?]_ they asked.

Alphys looked sheepish “Well, I’m not much of a cook and Undyne is banned from using any appliance other than the fridge. So, yeah.”

The child narrowed their eyes in envy. _[Wow! Lucky!]_

“What have you been up to, Frisk?” the lizard askes changing tack.

The child shrugged, deciding right then they needed to take their shoes off they dumped their sneakers and socks unceremoniously on the floor before answering.

[Ember leant me Dungeon Quest and I've almost finished it] they signed examining a pile of DVDs on the coffee table. They got distracted quickly picking up box set after box set and peering at the cover art.

Alphys clapped her hands together “Oh awesome! Man, Dungeon Quest! That's such a good series! The sorceress Morgan is totally my new waifu.”

[I like the first lady you meet in the purple dress she's my favourite I've been trying to unlock her romance path all game] Frisk signed only turning towards her to show their hands their eyes moving focusing their attention on other things around the room.

“Frisk you know that's the player’s mother, right?”

The child winked obviously and deliberately.

 _[Yeah!]_ they dragged out the sign for yes and made finger guns with their tiny kid hands. It looked a lot cuter than when Sans did it. A comical kid version of the older skeleton.

Alphys blinked a few times, uncertain what to say. Then she laughed.  “Oh…kay? Who's your other favourite character?”

 _[The man who sells you bread rolls!]_ They beamed. _[He’s so cool!]_

You mean the shopkeeper NPC? Frisk have you even left the starting town?

The child frowned. _[There's more than one town?]_

Alphys’ jaw dropped and she palmed a scaly hand to her brow, “Ohhhh, Frisk. Wow.”

“What's up, nerds!?” huffed Undyne vaulting over the sofa arm to land smooshed between her girlfriend and the child. “Let's put an episode on!” She reached for the remote.

Alphys beamed, snuggling up to her girlfriend. She looked expectantly at the television. “Oh man! the first episode is so good, Undyne cried!”

“Hey, spoilers!” Undyne butted in, smoothing back her wet hair. “and shhh! As far as anyone knows, Frisk, I don’t cry at anime…”

Frisk giggled to themself, content to just exist amongst their aunts and their playful bickering. After all, for all Frisk loved watching anime on date night that was just one part of the whole experience. They loved it here because it was real and it was safe.

“Right! Sorry Frisk! Let’s get started”

* * *

Sans and Toriel arrived back around 11:30. Frisk was stretched out across both aunts, they’d nodded off halfway through the last episode. Alphys had to wiggle herself out from under the sleeping child to answer the door. Frisk just hugged their bear tighter and snuggled closer into Undyne’s lap. The monster was torn up between staying as still as possible as not to bother the child but also wanting to get a photo to put on Facebook of the adorable scene before her.

Alphys let Tori in. The goat woman gently bent down and lifted the child from Undyne’s lap, kissing their soft dark hair and restign them on her hip. Sans followed her in collecting Frisk’s things and putting them into their backpack.

“Hey there, kiddo.” He breathed, smiling. Frisk opened their dark brown eyes and blinked sluggishly first at Toriel, then at Sans.

“ _Muh_?” said Frisk, little voice quiet and fragile.

“It’s just me, little one. We’re going home, okay?” The child nodded.

“Mom.” Frisk whispered. But then they moved their hands in position to sign, but rubbed their half-open eyes.  _[Can we bring the DVDs with us for Azzy?]_

Toriel frowned uncertain. “What’s that, my child?”

“Do you want to borrow Alchemy Sisters?” asked Alphys, piecing together the child’s sleep-sluggish signs. “To show your brother?”

Frisk nodded, eyelids heavy and falling heavy again. _[Is that okay?]_

“Of course, Frisk.” Alphys beamed. “I’m glad you liked it!”

Undyne had fetched the boxset and taken the DVD out from the DVD player. From the other side of the room she slam-dunked it straight into the backpack Sans held open for her. Frisk gave a sleepy thumbs up.

“Nice shot.” Said the skeleton.  

Undyne laughed shaking her long red hair dramatically, it flowed out around her like a lion’s mane.

“Thanks.” She said, posing like a some kind of anime statue.

Alphys turned a fantastic shade of orange. “A-anyway. Thanks’ for coming, Frisk! That was fun.”

“Thank you, Doctor Alphys, Captain Undyne for looking after them.” Toriel smiled, “They do love spending time with you.”

The child nodded against her. Their bangs falling into their eyes again.

“Let’s go Sans, my dear. Let’s leave Undyne and Alphys be.” said Toriel.

Frisk clung snug to their mother’s fur, their arms around her neck. Behind their closed eyes their little eyes head spun with scenes of magic and friendship, two sisters against the world trying to save the people they loved. Asriel would love this show, they thought it was right up his alley, and sufficiently sappy that the little goat child would probably bawl like a baby. Good tears though, happy tears. Those were okay.

Frisk loved Date night. They hugged their mother tight as she stepped out into the night air. Frisk loved their family. They loved being safe.


	3. Frisk and Toriel: New Room

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Monster Family moves house and Frisk now has a room of their own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoops I posted this without the notes first for some reason. Here's a lowkey sad chapter and some more Frisk backstory. I feel the things they were fleeing were very human problems, there's no big bad wolf character they're running away from just a series of very flawed adults with a lot of problems too big for an eight year old kid to carry. This fic will go into more detail about them later. Also coming up will be an Asriel-centric chapter. It's the summer holidays here so my updating is going to be very sporadic but I have a bunch of writing i have planned to do for this and my Shermy Pines series while i'm away and without internet so that's something I guess.

Frisk loved their new house. First of all, they lived above Papyrus’ restaurant, who else had that? Secondly, Frisk no longer shared a bedroom with Papyrus, they had their own room to themself. Well, they shared it with Asriel but he didn’t need a bed or anything he was content as long as he had enough window space out of which to yell comments at passers-by when he was in a more Flowey frame of mind.

They had their own bed with their favourite blanket, a bookshelf of manga and storybooks and a trunk of toys just for them, just for Frisk. They tugged open the big closet door, inside was a rainbow of clothes that fit them and made them feel warm and safe. They had space to exist and just be themself, away from judging eyes. There was a notch on the wall where Toriel had marked their height in purple crayon, Papyrus feeling left out added his own height in red felt pen. Sans sensing a trend had later added his own in pencil. Frisk was surrounded in warmth and love.   

They were overwhelmed with love. They started to cry.

 Toriel came into Frisk’s new bedroom with a clean basket of laundry which she promptly dropped against the hardwood floor, upon seeing her child in tears.

She was crouched down beside them in a matter of seconds.

“Frisk, my child!? What’s wrong?  are you hurt?”

 _[I’ve never had my own room before.]_ The child ducked their head shy all of a sudden.

Their mother laughed, mostly relieved there was no damage done. “Oh sweet Frisk, that’s why you’re crying?"

Frisk, through their tears started pointing at objects and thumping their chest with a hand to indicate possession.

_[That’s mine, that’s mine, mine, mine, and mine.]_

Toriel brushed the child’s bangs from their eyes, wiping tears with the fur of her hand.

“Yes, little one. This is your space. It’s just for you.”

_[My wastebasket?]_

“Sure.” The goat monster was uncertain as to where this was going. Frisk could hear it in their voice.

 _[My monkey?]_ They pointed at a green stuffed animal half hanging out of their toy box.

“Yes, my child.”

 _[My bed, my blanket.]_ They began to flap their hands in elation, tears running down their chubby cheeks.

Toriel sighed, concern staining her soft features. “Oh Frisk, honey. Are you alright?”

 _[I’m safe?]_ They signed with shaky hands. It was a question, they were expecting an answer.

“Of course you are safe here.” Toriel’s arms wrapped tightly around the sobbing child. “You’re safe here, Frisk. Sans and I are just down the hall. Papyrus’ room is next door. You’re okay my darling, you’re safe.”

The child cried harder against her chest, soft wounded noises, like a frightened baby deer.

 “Frisk, what is this about?”

The child shook their head, their hands moved to force out the staccato signs, their shoulders dragging downwards and forwards. _[Don’t wanna talk]_

 Their posture remained closed off and timid. Tori gentled dabbed at their cheeks soothing sounds bubbling from her throat.

 “You don’t want to talk about it? You don’t think it’ll make you feel better?”

Frisk shook their head.

 _[Bad. Bad. Bad. Bad.]_ They screamed the sign their little hand pulling down from their chin, over and over.

Toriel stroked their hair making soft, cooing noises. “Ssh. Hush now little one you don’t have to talk about anything you don’t want to. Your room is safe, and just for you. Ok?”

Frisk nodded and hugged her tighter buried their face into her fur.

_[You’re the best mom I’ve ever had.]_

Tori chuckled, “Well you’re the best Frisk I’ve ever had.” Then the realisation of what the child meant hit her she frowned.

 “O-Oh. Frisk, if you ever…” She trailed off unsure whether to bring it up.

The child stared at her puffy-eyed and confused waiting for her to finish. “Little Frisk, if you ever wanted to talk about your birth mother...”

Frisk shook their head rapidly they clenched their eyes shut and bright their fists up to cover their face

_[You're Mom. No others.]_

“I know my child; it was only a suggestion. Sometimes it helps to talk about the bad times as well as the good so the feelings don’t have too much power over you, so you can feel more safe.” The goat monster pressed a kiss to the top of the child's hair.

Gently with soft paws Tori peeled away the child’s hands from their face. Frisk through their armsa round her neck, a few gasping sobs in rounds like gunfire came up unbidden from their chest. For several minutes they clung together like that, saying nothing.

Frisk didn’t want to look at the memories that sprung up in pictures in their head, a lithe and lanky young woman who shared Frisk’s eyes and pointy cheekbones. In her child’s eyes she could have been a princess or a valiant knight from a storybook if she only had the energy to brush her own hair and wipe the days-old mascara stains from her skin. Sometimes she’d sing to Frisk when they were upset, sad ethereal songs in a tongue they didn’t speak. They didn’t hate her, they couldn’t hate her, she already did that too much herself.

Their hands began to move, in fluid connected motions like a spindle of thread unravelling. Frisk didn’t know just how to get the thoughts out. The situation was complex, too complex for a then eight-year-old.

_[She wasn't bad.  She never hit me. Just sad. Too sad to do Mom things. She called me the wrong name, gave me old dresses. She cried when I didn't talk. She always cried. She ended up making me sad too. Like a sickness. So I went to the mountain. She wouldn't care. I had no one to miss me.]_

They heard the breath hitch in Toriel’s throat. Their signs came out in short bursts, Frisk turned their body away from Tori, something they usually only did when they found eye contact difficult or upsetting. This was the most information the child had ever divulged about their life before they fell.

Toriel’s eyes were wet and sparkling. She hung on to every sign, her breath unsteadied. Frisk frowned, they didn’t mean to upset her she had just asked for the truth. They stared out from the shadow their bangs cast across their forehead. Trying with all their efforts to gauge whether she was sad or angry.

“Well, I would miss you, Frisk. I miss you every time you go to work at the embassy, I miss you when you're not in my class at school.

_[I love you, Mom]_

“-and I love you too my child, we all love you very much.”

_[I know.]_

There wasn’t anything else either of them could say. Frisk wiped their face and tried to focus on the good times. Their monster family, their new house, their brother, their new room.

Tori sensing an end of the conversation, suggested a change of scenery.

“How about after I finish up here, you and Asriel can come help me make some cookies for the Monster Mom’s Alliance meeting tonight?”

She held out a hand to pull the child up to stand.

Frisk took it, and timidly they smiled.


End file.
